y&f interview part II

(*note* c.l. do you recognize the title of this magazine? how about the interviewer's last name?)
where were we...
vanissa interplak: so you have a daughter. tell me about her.
lady jaded: oh she is just the most delicious thing known to mankind. she is wildeyed and crazyhaired and loves halloween just as much as i do, and andy does, and briget from 'girls next door' does...
vi: briget from 'girls next door'?
lj: yea, you know. not the pretty one or the dumb one. the boring, slightly ugly one? who i hated until last year i figured out that she is obsessed with halloween. much like me. she starts celebrating on october 1st, just like me! at an episode that just was on recently, they went to a baby shower of some explaymate and she got the baby its first halloween costume!
vi: do you watch 'girls next door' often?
lj: if its on and nothing else better is on. i like it. once, on viva la bam, holly was on. she's the pretty one.
vi: what other shows do you watch?
lj: mostly i watch adult swim. we're obsessed with it, and this past sunday i actually got to watch the new, sunday-night-only shows. like metalocalypse and squid billies. and pee wees playhouse is just frighteningly hilarious. i love it. as far as tv goes, we are pretty much addicted to tiVo since we would miss everything. we watch nip/tuck, which is sucking balls but should get better next week. um...house. grey's anatomy. which is interesting since i hate EVERYONE on the show but love the show. i guess i like mcdreamy. just cuz he was from 'can't buy me love' which was like one of my favorite movies from when i was a kid. i don't know...that's really it.
vi: let's talk about some "it" stars. what do you think of lindsey lohan?
lj: ew, why would you ask me about that freckly disaster? i fucking hate her. however, my cousin's cousin used to go to school with her in merrick long island, and she had a huge crush on him but since she was an ugly, freckly little beast, he broke her heart. how awesome is that?
vi: how about paris hilton?
lj: pretty sure nick carter beat the shit out of her. also, she's dumb. but she doesn't really bother me.
vi: jessica simpson.
lj: oh you want me to go there? she is a filthy, dirty little whore. who had SEX with bam margera when MARRIED. no one told you to be a fucking virgin when you got married you twit. oh wait, yes, your daddy did. did you know her father gave her a ring when she was 12 to 'promise' she'd save herself? is that not creepy? i mean, my parents told me they'd buy me a car if i didn't have sex, but there were so many holes in that...like, did i have to wait til i was 16? married? when was the car coming? did they think i thought they'd ever have the money to buy me a car? anyway, i hate jessica simpson. i also hate the way she looks.
vi: ashlee simpson.
lj: oh you mean, sarah michelle gellar?
vi: brangelina...
lj: i honesly didn't ever believe that they were together in the first place. like, they never came out as a couple. so i don't really give a shit. i like angelina jolie. i hate brad pitt. i really hate jennifer anniston. but i love maddox.
vi: tori spelling
lj: she is definately not an IT girl right now. however, she is pregnant and was totally screwed from her daddy's inhereitance. so i guess she has some press.
vi: britney
lj: the dumbest fuck on the face of the planet? first of all, why did she marry that man? he makes me itch just looking at him. then she goes and gets knocked up AGAIN when she can barely handle the one kid. i feel bad for her cuz she looked just as ugly as i did when pregnant. and dude, having one kid is hard enough, let alone having 2 that are like, the same age. why doesn't she find a nanny who is qualified? she has the money to hire someone w/ credentials. did you know that bam and jess margera are only 13 months apart? april and phil must love the sex...
vi: i guess bam margera...
lj: other than that he is an attention seeking, money hungry whore? i love him.

(stay tuned for even more of the incessant ramblings of lady jaded when y&f intervew part III comes...stay tuned...)