Summer has come, summer has nearly gone. One thing that I have gotten done (in abundance) is watch some shitastic television with my chickadees. While Anthony T. is following the rules and not allowing his beautiful baby girl to watch tv as of yet (The rules being set by the American Academy of Pediatrics states: "Pediatricians should urge parents to avoid television viewing for children under the age of 2 years. Although certain television programs may be promoted to this age group, research on early brain development shows that babies and toddlers have a critical need for direct interactions with parents and other significant caregivers (eg, child care providers) for healthy brain growth and the development of appropriate social, emotional, and cognitive skills. Therefore, exposing such young children to television programs should be discouraged." ) The rest of us slackers are allowing our children to ruin their lives and our minds by watching tv. My personal stance on tv watching isn't very strong since my girls don't watch tv that often. My 10 year old is 100% gamer girl, and won't watch anything unless it is about Mine Craft (or by Miranda Sings). My 3 year old goes to a babysitter that keeps them occupied throughout the day, so she doesn't watch tv there. However, while I'm home, we tend to use the tv as a little chillax break. How it works. "Mommy, it's wake up time." Ok, let's pee. "Then we can cuddle on the couch and watch tv?" Of course, my gentle little chickadee. I love to spend some lazy time being next to each other, relaxing, taking the time to wake our sleepy brains up (her, Disney; me, Facebook, email, ichat or Facetime with mom or sisters).
When J was born, I was in grad school for early childhood/special education, and I felt great about the tv shows available to her. It was in the early 00s, where the formats were being changed to focusing on language or math, asking questions to the audience, and giving a wait time for a response. We watched every single Baby Einstein dvd available. The AMAZING They Might Be Giant's Here Come the ABCs was also a staple (all about letters!)(her first concert was TMBG! It was fucking amazing! For me and Andy at least) as was Little Einstein's (you know, for the culture). I despised Dora, but she loved it so what could I do? I wanted her to have every opportunity open to her, so bilingual learning was a plus!She also attempted to watch WaWa Wubbzy, to which I laid a firm foot down. Oh, hells to the no. Not in my house.
(*note* two of the children I was seeing as an ABA therapist were obsessed with Dora and Wubbzy, and I
Flash forward 10 years. Here I am with a brand, spankin new fresh brained little angel. And the shows she watches.
Her first obsession was Yo Gabba Gabba, which at first gave me seizures, but once I saw Elijah Wood and Weezer (and Jimmy Eat World!)(and Tony Hawk!) on the show, I was like, "Hmmm, this is pretty cool, in a trippy way. In a 'I'm now tripping on acid with my 2 year old but it seems to be okay' way."). Looking back at the time, I reminisce about the good old days of "cappy cappy." The Halloween episode was just fantastic. The first song Scarl sang was "What what what is fun fun fun?" so YGG will always hold a place in my heart. Plus, whenever she had night terrors, the song "The Leaves are Falling" would make her stop screaming. We took her to see them at the Cap, and ran into a ton of friends, each one of us bragging about how much fun we were having, how many times they've "seen them", what great seats they had, etc. (This is what we used to do about bands. Not children show characters lip-synching and dancing like tools.)
Next came her obsession with the bald, 4 year old, whiney little fuck, Calliou. Don't get me wrong, Calliou isn't too dreadful. It can be cute. Unless you watch it over and over and over and over and then you want to kill everyone that lives in that Canadian neighborhood. The parents just dress like such douche bags. The colors and design are so primary and cutesy.It's hard to relate to. And once in awhile, they feature a "special needs" kid, but they go about it in a very subtle, passive way so I have to rewind and then check wikipedia to see if that kid, indeed, had some sort of developmental issues. I mean,kudos to them for trying to open up a conversation with children, but if I'm not fully grasping that Kevin has learning needs at 5 that put him behind 4 year old Cal, I doubt my 3 year old gets that.
Suddenly, and I assume this has to do with the peer influence of her cousin Dude and the team over at Miss Katie's, S will ONLY watch Disney. "Is this Disney?" she'll ask, with a haughty lilt to her voice. "No, it's Sprout." "Turn it OFF. I ONLY watch Disney now." Um, okay. I'm fine with that seeing as though Disney doesn't have commercials like every other channel making your child into a "Gimme gimme gimme." So Disney. Disney, Disney, Disney. I love Disney, but so much to say about so many issues. We are going to start simple.
Disney Junior. Where the Magic Begins.
You've got Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. Sofia the First. Doc McStuffins. Sheriff Callie. Jake and the Neverland Pirates.
Sigh.
So here I am going to reach out about the (Parent Approved) Disney Staples of 2014:
From JennyI: My 4 yr. old loves Sheriff Callie and Doc McStuffins which inspires her play as she is always giving check ups. I like both of these shows because of the female leads and the theme songs (love when she sings Sheriff Callie)! She's also been into Rabbids Invasions bc she loves slapstick. Sometimes it's funny, but the rabbis noises get annoying after a while.
From Therese ZM: We watch lots of Classic Disney movies and the Sound of Music. I can tolerate Sophia the First, because the songs are good, and Tim Gunn is hilarious in it.
*editor's note:(Tim Gunn fucking ROCKS Sophia! He kills me!!! He "makes it work.")
From JessLB: Doc rocks; she's a strong little black girl who aspires to be a doctor, she has an amazing imagination, and amazing perseverance and determination. Sofia is cool because she is a good, brave, strong little princess, and it is great to see her "saving the day" as opposed to the prince swooping in like in J's day of Disney. Sheriff Callie I'm going to need to watch a bit closer, because all I ever see is the cactus acting like a poor sport and loosing all his friends.
Non-Disney Praise:
Roby5n L: My 6yr old loves peg + cat (PBS). He loves that they solve problems using math (Alex loves math). He sings the songs from the show and retains the information. Alex doesn't care, but I appreciate that the math whiz problem solver is a girl. The 2 yr old likes space operas. lol - don't know why calliou gets a bad rep, never bothered me. (editor's note: god bless you! your brain must use more than the 5% us mere mortals use. I'm happy for you!)
JennyI: My 7 yr. old is into Full House lately and I find it cute and nostalgic.
Erwann M: Peppa, Dora, Daniel Tiger & Sesame Street are the current favorites.
(*editor's note: sesame street is the classic children's show, and I haven't seen it go wrong once, not even with Katy Perry's boob cleavage, which was nothing to write home about, less cancel her appearance).
Now, just a bit about what we cannot stand.
LadyJaded: I fucking hate hate hate Clarabelle from MMCH. She is so annoying. I also don't understand the deal with PETE. He's evil, he's nice, what? Finally, Toodles SHOULD NEVER HAVE GOTTEN A VOICE. IT IS HORRIFYING. It gives me the creeps.Also, they aren't helping children with problem solving, because many times, the Mouskatools make NO sense. "What can help us climb the fence? Meeska mooska mickeeeey mouse! We have a giraffe and the mystery mouskatool. You're RIGHT, the giraffe can help us climb the fence." Unrealistic. Ridiculous. You are confusing the children.
My final complaint: Jake and the Neverland Pirates. Jake has a sword. Cubby has a map. Izzy has...fairy dust. Fairy dust. FUCK ALL THAT SEXIST SHIT.
That is the end of my rant for now.
Roby5n L: I do want to punch Dora in the face, that show is not allowed in my house, not until she learns to keep her voice down
(*J refuses to allow any Dora into our house. She was apparently scarred by Dora) JennyI: (My 4 yo)she's also been into Rabbids Invasions bc she loves slapstick. Sometimes it's funny, but the rabbis noises get annoying after a while. The shows for (my 7 yo son's) age group that I can't stand are Adventure Time, Regular Show. Because I feel like you actually get dumber from watching them. (*editor's note: you do) Therese ZM: My three-year-old watches the new Care Bears, which I hate. But she also likes the Care Bears Movie from the 80s, which I loved also! Our children's television (Anthony, rule obeyer excluded) has a profound effect on us as adults, which, at a later date, I will get more into. But for now... |
**UPDATE** Pocoyo is a Spanish show that has British voices. It still sucks.
**SUPERUPDATE** PART 2 OF THIS ARTICLE IS AVAILABLE HERE
